


Exposure Therapy

by rieunn



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: All of the Members of Jericho are LGBT+ or Questioning or Allies, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Connor is Questioning, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Everyone is Human By The Way, Exposure therapy, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Jericho is a Chat Room, Josh is a Nerd, Josh is an Ally and with North, M/M, Markus is Bi, North is Bi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Physical Therapy, Pineapple Pizza Debates, RK900 is Who Knows What, Rating May Change, Simon is gay, Slow Burn, Therapist Markus, Traumatized Simon, Wherein Markus Helps Simon Overcome his Past, hank is a concerned dad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-06 19:19:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15892437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rieunn/pseuds/rieunn
Summary: Simon's daily life is haunted by events from his past. Although he believes he's doing just fine, Josh and North see things differently and finally, after five years of gentle urging and patience, force him to meet with a therapist in order to confront his fears and overcome them. Things take quite a different turn than what Simon expects.





	Exposure Therapy

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea of Markus being Simon's therapist and helping him via exposure therapy, and this story was born - have fun reading, my dudes!

  I startle awake, sweat cooling rapidly on my shaky body, breath coming and going in time with a throbbing headache I’ve only just become aware of. Seeing no one immediately around me or over me, I close my eyes and sit up, running a shaky hand over my hair, pushing it back and away from my face. Still, I can’t help but feel that something isn’t right. It only takes me a few deep, sighing breaths to notice the oddity – I grimace at the bright light streaming through the windows and lift my pale hand over my eyes to shield them. My eyebrows furrow. It’s a bit disturbing for me to realize that I didn’t close my curtains last night, especially since it’s been a habit of mine for a long time now. Thinking about last night, though, it makes sense, and the disturbed panic finally begins to subside. I’m safe, after all. Nothing happened, so I don’t have to worry.

  I get to my feet and attempt to stand; the pain in my head becomes dizzying and I’m forced to sit back down and collect myself before I attempt again – and am successful, thankfully. Without trying to move too much, I reach out, squinting, and pull closed the curtains on the window closest to me.

  “There. That’s better,” I mutter to myself. I scan my room for any oddities; if I left the curtains open, who _knows_ what other elements of my routine I could have neglected. Besides the bedroom curtains, though, I find myself pleased to see that everything is the way that it should be. No other curtains are open. The light on the security system is flashing green, the cameras looking out into the hallway and alleyway are functional and void of any alerts of people having been within their sight. Aside from the clothes I carelessly dispensed last night, my apartment, from what I can see, is as clean as it usually is. Everything is fine and undisturbed by anyone but me – just the way I like it.

  Pulling in the curtains on the other window in my room on my way out, I pick up my clothes and drop them off in the hamper of my small, closeted utility room. Before heading to the bathroom for a much-needed shower, I grab a fresh, clean set of clothes.

  The hot water and steam do wonders for both my headache and the dull anxiety in the back of my mind that something might not be right. It’s been a while since I’ve deviated from my daily set of routines and it wouldn’t be wrong to say that even just one small abnormality is throwing me off. There’s nothing about my life that I would say has been unpredictable from then up until this point, which is why I really shouldn’t be worried about anything else being off today. It’s just that, well. I’ve got this feeling that today is just... not going to go the way I want it to. It’s probably just paranoia, but, well, I do believe in the Chaos Theory, which definitely isn’t helping. I begin to feel light-headed, and after scrubbing so hard my raw skin can’t take much more of a sting from the water. I take one last deep sigh of steam, forearm flat against the tiled wall of the shower to keep myself upright as I turn the water off. I stand for a moment, watching the water as it rolls and drips along and off of my body, and then I exit, grabbing the towel that hangs on the wall next to the glass shower door and wrapping it fully around my shoulders, already shivering at the cold air that fans my bare body.

  For a moment, as I dry myself off and slip on my usual attire – long-sleeved shirt, t-shirt hoodie, and some jeans – I feel that everything might just be normal today. Nothing else has happened, right? I was just really exhausted from getting home so late last night and didn’t think to do anything but collapse right onto my bed and snuggle into the warmth of my blanket and pillows. That’s it. Nothing strange about the occasional slip-up, no matter how disciplined I may be.

  I continue in this train of thought until I walk back into my bedroom and grab my phone to check for messages... and that’s when I see that Jericho has alerted me to a missed call from North. This wouldn’t be so disconcerting if we were closer – as a borderline violent women’s rights activist and tattoo artist, she’s always been a little bit more than I can handle, although she can be endearing, at times. Her rough way of speaking always put me off, even before...

  Again, she’s just a little more than I can handle. I connect with Josh a little more, because he’s softer with me and more understanding of who I am and the way I operate. He never pushes me too much, if he pushes me at all, and we’re interested in a lot of the same things. I’d say the only thing that I don’t really share in common with him is that I’m an indecisive person with... grey morals. Josh and North have always been decisive – Josh a native-born pacifist on everything from pineapple pizza debates to drug use, and North a borderline warmonger with decidedly aggressive points of view. So, no pineapple pizza. Ever. It has been banned at all social occasions involving her. Anyways, I can usually see both sides of things that don’t involve getting people harmed, but other than that I tend to play it safe and not get involved. I guess you could compare my perspective to the supporting role of a character in a play. I’m the mediator, a behind-the-scenes kind of guy – I don’t get a lot of attention, and I prefer it that way. But, I digress.

  I have no idea what North may want to talk to me about, and I’m not really sure that I want to know. Josh and North live together, and typically if North ever needs anything from me, she tells Josh to call me because conversations between us tend to go south very quickly. Not North. I take a deep breath and tap on the green circle next to her name on my phone. It takes all of two seconds before she picks up, but she doesn’t immediately start yelling or huffing into my ear, like I expected her to. Since I was holding my phone away from my head in anticipation, I bring it closer, hoping I didn’t miss what she said – North hates repeating herself. After another second or so of silence, I start to get worried, so I mutter a quiet hello.

  An aggravated sigh reaches my ears, and I raise my eyebrows.

  “North? Is everything... okay?”

  “With me, yes. With you, apparently, not, according to Josh.” I go silent, my expression hardening.

  “... I’m fine. I don’t know why-”

  “I didn’t call you to hear excuses. It’s been five years, Simon. Five whole years. Josh cares about you, and so do I, despite our differences, and we can’t stand to watch you suffer anymore. It’s time for an intervention.” I furrow my eyebrows my heart thudding almost painfully in my chest, quickening with each breath I take.

  “I... I won’t do it – you of all people should know how _hard_ -”

  “And it’s because I know how hard it is that I won’t negotiate or relent on this anymore. Even Josh can’t understand why you won’t just _talk_ to someone-”

  “ _God_ – what good would it fucking do?” I yell, lips quivering with anger and self-loathing. North is silent, but everything is so loud – my unbalanced breathing, the blood rushing past my ears, my heart thundering away. My hands are shaking.

  I was right. Today is not going the way I planned at all.

  “... Simon, you won’t know what good it will do unless you just try it. Just once.” I don’t respond – can’t respond. I know she’s right. I know Josh is right. He’s always been trying – in his own, gentle way, to get me to try therapy. He was never able to get me to agree of my own will and was and is too much of a pacifist to force it onto me. North only stayed silent because... she understood me. In a way no one else could. That’s probably our only similarity. The only reason we’re able to maintain even a tense friendship. She sighs, softer than the one that she greeted me with.

  “Listen, if you just try it at least once, I’ll never badger you about it again. There’s someone in particular that I want you to see... his name is Markus Manfred. And before you say anything – yes, he’s _that_ Markus. He’s really good with all types of therapy; he’s very motivational and inspiring, and – this is the best part – he’s on Jericho.” This catches my attention.

  “Jericho? Really?”

  “Yeah. He’s actually the current moderator, I think. But, anyways. I’ve... told him a little bit about you. Not too much, obviously, because that’s where you come in, but, well. I set up an appointment for you with him today at 4 PM.” My eyes widen, and my heartbeat starts to quicken again.

  “You _what?”_

  “I told you, Simon, I’m not budging this time. And don’t even _think_ about not showing up, because, even if you don’t, I’ve given him your address and access to where you live. You’re _going_ to talk to him today.”

  The panic starts to set in, and I stand up, running a hand through my hair and stopping to grip it.

  “North, I literally _can’t_ make that appointment! Hailey’s rehearsal was last night, but the actual recital is today, and it starts _at_ 4!”

  “Then I guess you’ll just have to talk to him at your apartment. This isn’t getting postponed. You’ll never do it if you don’t do it today, and you know that.” I clench my jaw and my grip tightens around my phone.

  “You... you know how I feel about having people... in my space.”

  “... Yeah. But you’ve got no choice today. And honestly, I’ve got a feeling you won’t mind too much.”

_What the hell is that supposed to mean?_

  “But-”

  “Tell us how it goes, bye.”

  “H-Hey!” I say exasperatedly, but she’s already hung up. I open up Jericho and angrily type:

_**jerisquad sluts (3)** _

_10:38 AM - sighmon22: I hate you_

It’s petty, but it’s the only form of retaliation I feel I can muster.

_10:38 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: don’t care lol_

_10:39 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: omg wait did she tell u_

_10:39 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: you’d probably know if u weren’t too busy hiding away in ur room like a coward lmaooo_

_10:40 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: literally he took my phone and was like “north u talk to him I don’t want him to get mad at me”, dialed ur number, and then threw my phone @ me and ran_

_10:41 AM – sighmon22: i hate you now too josh_

_10: 41 AM – sighmon22: you’re both on my hate list_

_10: 41 AM – sighmon22: in fact, bc u both have betrayed me I’m bringing pineapple pizza and Pepsi instead of Coke to our next meetup_

_10:42 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: SIMON YOU BETTER NOT I FUCKING SWEAR_

_10:42 AM – sighmon22: and also I’m bringing mean girls and pretty in pink_

_10:41 AM – sighmon22: this mutiny will not be stood for_

_10:41 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: SIMON_

_10:42 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: omfg_

_10:42 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: north’s gonna kill u dude_

_10:43 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: also sthu the first mean girls sucks and I don’t wanna watch andie hecc things up with duckie again :((_

_10:43 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: IM GONNA SHOVE THAT DISGUSTING EXCUSE OF A PIZZA UP YOUR ASS SO FAR THAT ITLL SEND YOU BACK INTO ANOTHER ERA_

_10:43 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: north that’s mean you shouldn’t say that – or type in all-caps_

_10:43 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: ALSO ONLY LOSERS LIKE U DRINK FUCKING PEPSI AND YOU KNOW IT_

_10:44 AM – mit0ch0ndriac: nORTH_

_10:44 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: THE HELL WITH THAT FAKE ASS BITCH_

_10:44 AM – naturaleeiusdebent: FUCK U_

_10:45 AM – sighmon22: it’s happening and there’s nothing u can do about it bc u both betrayed me :/ sucks 2 be u guys ig_

  Talking with them in Jericho makes me feel a slight bit better about the situation, and even though I’m anxious and dreading this afternoon, I’m also already savoring the look of disgust that’ll be on North’s face when I bring in a box of Hawaiian. Mm, yes. Besides, well. North and Josh are right. As much as my stomach churns to even think about talking about it, I know that I should, like North said, at least try it once.

  Then again, haven’t I been doing just fine? With my routines, and the fact that I go to work and come straight home every day? I haven’t turned to any kind of weird or dangerous addiction. I’ve been okay. Maybe a little distant and unsociable, but isn’t that okay? I mean, I’ve got North and Josh, my two best (and only) friends. I don’t need anything or anyone else.

  A call interrupts my thoughts, and I almost drop my phone when I see who it is. I quickly slide my thumb over the green circle to answer the call and hold the phone up to my ear with my eyebrows raised.

  “Y-Yes, Ms. Banks?”

  “Your services will not be needed tonight, Simon. I will attend Hailey’s recital and take her out to dinner afterward.”

  “Oh, but, well, I told her I’d-”

  “I _don’t care_ what you told her. I am her mother, and I will be going, not you. And you’re still getting paid all the same, so what difference does it make?”

  “I-”

  “Exactly. None. Hailey will be having a friend over tonight. I expect you to come in tomorrow at 6:00 AM sharp – which I assume will be no problem, since you have time off today – to make breakfast for the girls and take them to school. And then, obviously, you’ll need to clean everything up. I’ll leave further instructions for you to follow on the refrigerator, as usual.”

  “Yes, ma’am...” I mutter, but she’s already ended the call.

  Hailey definitely won’t be happy about this. And I’m assuming the ‘friend’ she’ll be having over won’t really be a friend, but an effort on Ms. Banks’ part to maintain some stupid business relationship. It’s none of my business, really, but I always worry about Hailey. She’s a bright, playful girl, and I know her mom does her best to snuff that light out in favor of having a dull, proper daughter. A doll. I just hope by doing everything I can to take care of her I can keep her spirits up and her perspective open-minded. I sigh. I'll be sure to make it up to her later. Although now that I think about it, now I’ll definitely have time to make that meeting with... Markus. Right, the ex-boyfriend.

  Well. I guess this at least means that my apartment is safe. For now.

  Seeing as I have nothing to do for the next couple of hours, I decide to open up Jericho and am greeted by new notifications. I can wait until later to clean my apartment up and do some laundry. Despite my wishes to be at Hailey's recital, it has really been a while since I've been able to really kick back and do some relaxing. 

_**j** **erisquad sluts (3)** _

_10:46 AM - _naturaleeiusdebent: if you bring that shit to our next meetup im gonna make josh cry__

__10:47 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: nooo, north pls_ _

__10:47 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: why would you do that to me :((_ _

__10:48 AM - _naturaleeiusdebent: it's pineapple pizza josh__ _

___10:48 AM - _naturaleeiusdebent: you gotta understand__ _ _

____10:48 AM - _naturaleeiusdebent: you know i love you babe, even when you cry ;)__ _ _ _

_____10:49 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: aww, i love you too :) <3_ _ _ _ _

So much for relaxing.

_10:51 AM - sighmon22: right in front of my salad??_

_10:51 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: lmAO SIMON_

_10:52 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: he's just jealous_

_10:52 AM - sighmon22: wrong_

_10:52 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: speaking of which, u don't have to be jealous much longer lol Markus swings both ways u know_

_10:53 AM - sighmon22: omg_

_10:53 AM - sighmon22: bhdjsuuhwuchhvhuvfejs_

_10:53 AM - sighmon22: no fucking way dude that's so weird he used to be ur ex no no no goodbye_

_10:54 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: lmaoo it's not weird, there's no bad blood between us_

_10:54 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: actually, he's a pretty nice guy now that i think about it, totally ur type_

_10:55 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: for once I actually kinda agree with you, I'm imagining it and its so cute_

_10:55 AM - sighmon22: You guys are insane, no way_

_10:55 AM - sighmon22: I don't know a thing about him? Anyways, you know how it is with me. I'm not doing it, I'm not ready for that kind of thing at all_

_10:56 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: I'm pretty sure you're ready, actually. Five years, Simon. You're great, don't sell yourself short. Anyone would be lucky to have you. I think as long as you open up and accept yourself and learn to overcome what's happened, you'll be fine in a relationship. :)_

_10:57 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: Josh is right. And like, honestly, i think if markus even had a type, it'd be you. In fact, I think its inevitable. I'm gonna go place bets with Connor brb_

_10:57 AM - sighmon22: DO NOT PLACE BETS ON MY NON-EXISTANT LOVE LIFE PLS_

_10:59 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: It's too late, I can see her phone from here and she's doing it. They've negotiated up to $25 and North's trying to push it up to $30 lmaoo_

_11:00 AM - sighmon22: i hate you both_

_11:00 AM - sighmon22: thanks for giving me one more thing to be anxious about for this afternoon_

_11:01 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: oh pls you'll be fine and then you'll be begging me to set you up even further with him_

_11:01 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: "oh north he's so hot and kind pls set us up on a date so I can apply the three-date rule"_

_11:02 AM - sighmon22: it's not happening_

_11:02 AM - sighmon22: also what's the three date rule_

_11:03 AM - mit0ch0ndriac: annnd this is where I log out_

**_jerisquad sluts (2)_ **

_11:03 AM - naturaleeiusdebent: why don't you ask markus instead of me ;)_

**_jerisquad sluts (1)_ **

_11:04 AM - sighmon22: I really hate u guys_

**_jerisquad sluts (0)_ **

  I grimace as I log out of Jericho, pushing a hand to my head, which is throbbing again, likely due to a combination of lack of sleep and staring at a phone screen for the majority of the morning.

  Although I appreciate what Josh and North are doing for me, I know for certain that there's no way I could ever feel anything more than a slight attraction or close friendship for anyone. I'm a different person now than who I used to be. I'd say that I'm more cautious, but I'm sure there are others who would call me paranoid and fearful. All I know is that this 'Markus' likely won't have any affect on me aside from possibly whatever alleviation he can provide for my fears and anxieties. But that's enough worrying about that. Whatever happens will happen, and, like North said, I'm sure I'll be fine.

  I get to my feet and head over to the utility room, where I put to wash the dirty clothes that I've accumulated over the past three or so days. After that I dust everything in my house down twice over, vacuum, make myself a sandwich, mop the kitchen and office room, and then finally put my clothes to dry. This takes me all of about two and half hours, during which my headache hasn't relented at all and my exhaustion has reached its peak. I press the button on the side of my phone and when the screen comes alive I see that it's around 1:45 PM. 

  "I've got time to take a small nap..." I mutter to myself, and before I know it I'm back on my bed, snuggling into the sheets, not giving a thought to the fact that I should probably set an alarm.  _I'll wake up... soon..._ I think, before I drift off into a restless, head-pounding sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Kudos are great but I must admit I'm an absolute slut for comments, so if you wanna make my day and leave me one about your favorite part of the story or to just express something about what I've written, feel more than free to do so!  
> I hope you all have a great week! Every kudos goes towards saving Josh and North from Simon's ultimate punishment. If it can even be called that, lol.


End file.
